Be careful on what you wish and dream for.

Wishes and dreams can be very deadly... Dangerous I mean. I can turn out good, great, it could be the best thing ever... but it can also be so out of control that neither you nor anyone else can handle it... I found that out the hard way.


One of the girls said to me “Love only comes once in your life” and that makes me wonder… how do you know if its love, how do you know if it’s there. How do you know what love is? What I found out is that I don’t know what love is, I’d always thought I knew, but I realized that it was only an overwhelming excitement of new experiences. That’s what I realized with part of my feelings…

I’ve always said that I’m a committed person, and I personally still believe that I am!!! I mean like if I do like (“LOVE”) someone then I’ll give them my full attention… but lately I’ve been really messed up in that factor… I’ve been jumping from here to there… continuously with new girls every so often, and honestly I don’t know way it’s happening, I don’t even realize it until its now too late!! I think maybe this is happening is because I want to see my options… like look for someone I actually like, then I’ll stop, but I have found someone I really like, but I cant be with her so I try to continue this random pick up play… to forget about the fact I cant have her…. Is that right? Is that’s what’s happening? Probably.

I feel so messed up. I don’t know what I really want right now. Things that I want just always seem to have a positive and a negative… but then everything is like that, if not to you then for others around you or just others.

-[Pd]-