everything that happened lately seems to be involving Jane, or she has some part in it.
(yes Jane, i know you're reading this)
yes, that's all i got from 10 hours or so of thinking.
because no matter how much i think or how many game plans i come up with....
i will not predict and take first steps, i will only deal with the situations as they come.
i saw it coming to this point again, but i will not do the whole 'i told you so' approach, i never really liked that.
so if you don't know what I'm talking about, here is where i discuss...
first issue is with Bridgette,
Bridgette has recently been in Sydney again for a short time, and she's been wanting to see me and she kept asking me to just hang out and catch up, and so i agreed and we made certain arrangements and rules leading to this meeting...
so we kept our space and stayed behind rules, and we have been talking and seeing each other.
I've been enjoying her company, i will not lie.. i do enjoy her company, as someone to hang out with, there is just a certain comfort i have with different people and i feel comfortable with Bridgette, despite our past.
which brings me to where it all went wrong, Jane and many other people are not too happy about the coming and going with me and Bridgette, they don't like that Bridgette is in my life at all, but Jane is the most opened about it.
Jane has been going after Bridgette, telling her to back off and go away...threaten also.
and lecturing me about what happened between Bridgette and i last time and how or what she thinks its going to end like.
when I'm with Bridgette, I'm not intending or expecting anything to happen, i just like her company... and i don't know if anything is intended or expected on her side, but so far it seems pretty simple.
and at the same time, i don't know what might or might not happen further down the days.
second issue is Shane,
back bone of this is, he really likes my friend Sara, totally smitten by her but she is leaving Sydney tomorrow and she doesn't like him in that way.
Shane is a type of guy that can get attached to something or someone really easily, and Sara happens to be it this time.
he has never had a girlfriend, so i guess that is why he hasn't learnt how to let go yet, even his hobbies.
he is also a short tempered guy, so he tends to snap about things and rush his thoughts and conclusions...
he also tends to drag a situation and force upon the situation until he gets some sort of answer that satisfies him, which makes other people in the situation uncomfortable.
and I'm guessing that he has pushed the limit with Sara before when he told her that he liked her.
everyone thought everything was ok and he is ok about her, but i guess the fact of seeing her heaps for this past week and triggered the feelings again because he is not taking her departure so well, he is up to the point where he is jealous of her with other people or talking about other people, and up to the point where he wants to move to Brisbane, to be somewhat closer to her.
he has stated that he wants to move to Brisbane multiple times now, and again a few more when he was here earlier.
with the jealous vibe, Jane has somehow put the thought for him the fear of something happening between Sara and I, i can feel him hesitating with me and trying to hide the fact that he thinks about it, i know he thinks about it because,
Jane asked him to describe how Sara is to her and he managed to say she is bi-curious, and Jane put the facts together as, when there is an outing, there is only three of us, me, Sara and Shane.. and she asked him if he felt that i was intruding, if he wanted me there or not and why was i always there...
she asked him how Sara and i was like around each other, the fact is that we joke a lot and we have dirty comments... her and i are good friends, and the comfortable level is high.
but she managed to turn all that into something that is not.
she also stated that i apparently do not like trios, and put the thoughts to him that there is competitions upon him and i, for Sara, that's why I'm always there.
i admit, i did like Sara... many years ago, and i don't know if i have told him that or if he knows about it, but i fear that if he does have the knowledge of it then it feeds to the non existent competition that got going in his mind, thanks to the smart arse Jane.
Sara is leaving for Brisbane, and we all have been making the most of the remaining time left with her, i know she isn't gone forever, like i know i will see her again.
Shane is taking it really hard that she is leaving, he really wants to take her to the airport, he said he didn't have the goodbye that he wanted ( i guess because i was there in his moment again) yesterday at her farewell gathering, and i felt a jealous vibe from him when people started arriving, single guys to be exact. there was two. he withdraw from socialising with everyone, and he had to leave for work after a while, which is where the goodbye happened, he really didn't want to leave so soon.
i try not to make anything my business, or try to put unwanted advice, and opinions or anything, but i know it's happening and all i can do is be supportive and listen when comfort is being seek..
but now he is too caught up in his mind about her, that i just have to push the facts to him.
i can't be nice and just sugar coat everything, i don't like lies.. i'm honest.
and he still pushes that he wants to be with her.
..... i left for a few times and i lost what i was on about, and i think i may have repeated some parts. and i may have typos, i'm not re-reading this.
. i don't know how to deal with Jane, before it was easy because she was just on my business and i learnt how to ignore the shit parts that comes out of her...
but now it is involving my friends, people in my life... and i can't stop it, other people don't know how she is like, and will take her talk in to consideration and produce more problems.
my family isn't in such a great place either, but we try to get by.
work is in such a mess.
i feel bad that all these things are happening, but i can't do much about it...
theres more going on, but i need a break.
