i dont seem to care about much these days.........and i just kinda noticed so. because right now. just then im just thinking and alot has been happening. and im not excited at all. just really lame feeling. just not out there anymore. lost concentration on things... only focused on two things i reckon.
Just then... i had a phone call that i have been moved and rated up to second for my Dj carree.. and so far im not excited... and like a month ago.. i was rated third and i was hell excited.. i'm too distracted.!!!!.too distracted with my lonesome heart. and now im starting to think that i dont want anything but some to love and to love me back. my carree is worthless to me. my future is also.all i really want and need is someone who cares and to be with.
i'v also been in a suicidual state lately as well. on Friday i was(suppose to) kill myself.i didnt do it because to think of it.. killing myself infront of someone that iw ant to get the point into is worthless, i mean the message would be loud and clear.. but its so... stupid. altho i am stupid....i didnt want to go that way. i did before but not now.
All i want is for people to understand me. but no one does. they just leave. just that simple.
